Anomalous Subsurface Environment: The Clown War, Play Report

    I've played in three sessions so far of a pickup game of Anomalous Subsurface Environment (ASE), a very gonzo and science fantasy megadungeon, run by Mr.Mann on the rainbow OSR discord server, and using vaguely OD&D or B/X and his houserules.

Below is a (hopefully) not too long play report of what happened in those three sessions as we murder just a frankly unhinged number of clowns.

Player Characters

• Herzgrau “Doberman” Mauler, level 3 Fighter 
  
• Razzledazzle, level 1 Magic-User
• Teela, level 1 Halfling
• Misha the Wide, level 2 War Bear
• One Man Army Corps (OMAC), level 1 Cleric
• Ascellus Tiramisu, Level 3 Fighter 
• Alon, level 2? Magic-User 
• Sparkles Witfully, Level 3 Cleric of Science

Sidekicks

1. Sir Esferico, Balloon Bodyguard
2. Oog

Preamble (Sessions 1 & 2)

Misha the Wide, a Hill Cantons War Bear, somehow finds himself in this strange land of Wizard Towers, sci-fi tech and, most terribly of all, dog-headed people (sorry Doberman)!

In the first delve the party is already going down to level 4 of the dungeon, and they find a circus being run by strange red painted naked men. After enjoying the various sideshows and carnival games most of the party piles into the circus proper to watch the show. Doberman and another character refuse to do so and end up being hassled by Barnabous, the carnival crier, and the ticket collector. Things escalate into a fight, multiple carnies get killed by a flamethrower and the party engage in a fighting retreat, killing Barnabous (maybe, since he comes back) in the process.

The next delve the group decides to scout out the territory of these dungeon clowns and get a read for their strength, numbers and other intel, in preparation for a full on assault on them. After a few brief encounters and questions the party has some vague idea of their territory, rescue and befriend a big man named Oog, and also a character that got turned to stone.

The Clown War (Session 3)

The party gathers up its numbers, recruiting several level 1 characters, equipping themselves well (Misha now owning a bespoke large set of plate armor which puts his Descending AC to 0!) and venture down to level 4 again, looking for trouble.

With good communication, coordinated action and psychotic mercilessness the party begins to systematically go room by room, slaughtering any naked clown people they find, only stopping occasionally to interrogate some before murdering them as well.

Through this process the party learns several useful bits of information. There are in total about 70 to 80 painted men, the enormous bronze gong near by is used for prisoner exchange with other denizens of the dungeon (which the clowns kill and eat as a way to keep the ecology of the dungeon in balance) and they do not appear to have a solid leadership in place.

Through more commitment of war crimes (murdering unsuspecting targets, murdering people who have surrendered) the party makes its way into a foul smelling kitchen where a particularly large painted man chef is busing himself with some cooking. Ascellus, in a bout of brashness, challenges the Chef to a duel, which the Chef quickly starts winning, at which point he is also murdered by the rest of the party.

Loot is found and, more importantly, a secret door leading to the back corridors of the clown territory. using those passages the party reach what appears to be living quarters and/or a clown brothel (the mind shudders), and proceed to slaughter even more them. Unfortunately the last assault leaves victims alive for long enough to start screaming which alerts the painted men patrolling army.

The party decides to take a pincer position in a four way intersection of hallways, and through the use of firebombs and flamethrower (see previous mention of war crimes) manage to cut off the first wave of the clown army. Unfortunately the second wave bring along with them a cannon, which they proceed to fire into the central branch of the party, which happens to house the vulnerable magic-users.

Alon gets a broken leg, but poor Razzledazzle gets hit square in the chest, blowing  hole out of him and allowing him one last spell (his finel razzledazzle if you will) before he expires. The party then proceeds to firebomb the ever living hell out of the shield-wielding clowns, which finally routs them and allows the party a chance  retreat themselves.

Thus ends the first phase of the Clown War. The casualties on both sides are, as follows:

The Party: Razzledazzle, the Magic-user (Dead), Alon the Magic-user (wounded, recovering).

The Dungeon Clowns: 40 Painted Men (dead), 1 Painted Man Chef (dead)

Thoughts and Observations

I quite enjoy Mr.Mann's house rules, and repurposes and tweaked my Hill Cantons OSE character (that I never got to actually play in B/X, only a variant of him using 5e) to fit better. He's almost at level 3, which is impressive, though HC characters do start at level 2 so there is that.

The session focusing on the Clown War was very high energy and fast paced. All of this clown murder took place within 2 hours of gaming (less even since we also had preamble and people sorting out inventories and such). Despite 8 people playing in a voice-only pick up game, things ran smoothly through the employment of classic player roles - a Caller (extra important in the big fights), a Mapper, a Turn Keeper and a Quartermaster (me in this case, mostly recording the kills).

The reason for the especially bloodthirsty session is that in Mr.Mann's rules 1 HD worth of enemies killed gives 100 experience, similar to my OD&D campaign I've wrote about on here. So that very much leads to trying to take out as many enemies as possible.

ASE itself is...just as bizarre and absurd as I've heard (I've only read the general setting and like 5 rooms on floor 1, so I was going in blind). While things did run well enough considering the number of players, since this was a pickup game we also had several people who had not played in the previous sessions and as such were perhaps a bit lost as to what on earth was going on and why we were killing clowns in this dungeon. Or, in fact, why the dog-headed man had a goddamn flamethrower (that one I don't know either!)